We all want our children to grow up feeling confident and to be successful. Understanding that challenges will come up in their lives, we want to help build a good foundation to deal with stress, difficulties and moments of self-doubt. I have found that one of the biggest impacts I can have on my daughter’s life starts with me. How I communicate with myself and with others.
Children are always watching us and listening to us and the way we speak with ourselves and others. Start by looking at how you communicate. How do you talk about yourself? How do you talk about others? Our children pick up on these small details. Statements such as “I look fat in this dress” teaches your child to speak unkind words to themselves. And although, we all have moments when we are unhappy with ourselves, the way in which we deal with it can be a stepping stone in our children’s future communication with themselves.
The first step is getting rid of our negative words. You can change your statement to something like, I would like to get to the gym this week so I can continue to be healthy. The point is to reframe the way you speak to yourself for the benefit of both you and your child. I believe that if you use this one simple technique, your whole world can change dramatically.
In this article you will find a few simple tips to help you build a better relationship with your child. If you have some tips that have worked for you and your family please share them in the comments that below.
Give them love & support
Children need to hear that they are loved and supported no matter what they do in life. As parents our love is unconditional. We understand this from the day our children our born. Yet, we can forget to inform our children of this. When they make mistakes in life, it is important for you to separate the action from the child. And talk with them, not at them. Help them understand that you love them no matter what.
Give them choices
Allowing your children to make simple decisions gives them a chance to feel as if they have control over their world.
It is important to start this one at a young age. If you give them a few choices to pick from it will save you from any arguments and gives the child a sense of control. As they get older you can give your child more opportunities with more important choices.
As parents we may want to rush in and solve our kid’s problems for them. But, it’s important that we give our kids the opportunity to work out their problems on their own.
If your child runs up to you because their best friend is playing with their doll. Don’t jump in and handle it. Ask your child, questions to help guide them. Ask them, Is there a nice way to get your toy back? Let them think of the answers themselves and follow through with the decisions they make.
Everyone loves to feel important and children are no different. Children love to feel needed.
No matter what you are doing at the grocery store or at home with the kids, they love to help. Create small tasks for your kids to do. Ask them if they would like to be your special helper for the day. Give them jobs like setting the table and finding items at the store. Let them know that they really helped you out and that you appreciate it.
Is the glass half empty?
There are usually two types of people in this world, when it comes to how we look at situations.
You can either be a person who see’s that the glass is half full or half empty. How we look at situations and our attitude can determine the outcome for us.
If your child is having a hard time in math Relay, to the child that you understand how they feel. Let them know that everyone learns at their own pace. Follow that up with focusing on other things that they are good at. And let them know that you are willing to help them each night to become better at math. The point is to not dwell on the negative aspect of the situation but find the good points in it. Attitude is everything.
We only get a certain amount of time with our kids. The key is to make the most of it. Let them know that you value them as an individual. Talk about their future plans and dreams. Let them know that they can make a difference in this world just by being themselves.