Who knew that one little Snapchat could cause a wave of sociological discussions on friendships, loyalty, and cheating? Los Angeles Lakers’ player, D’Angelo Russell clearly had no idea that he would be the driving force behind the breakdown of the (im)moral fiber of the male-female and male-male dynamic. Russell gave an interview prior to the Lakers game on Wednesday night, Mar. 30, 2016, saying, “I wish I could make things better right away, but I can’t.”
Russell committed an unforgivable violation of the “guy code” by wet snitching on Nick Young regarding Young’s infidelity. If you have not seen it by now, Russell uploaded a Snapchat of Young confessing to having a dalliance or two with women other than his fiancee, rapper Iggy Azalea.
Since his recording of his teammate’s cheating confession, Russell has been the topic of discussion on sports broadcasts from Charlotte to Boston and back to LA. Unnamed players are being quoted in the media claiming that they would not want to play on a team with Russell in the future.
How is it that Russell is getting such backlash, yet he plays on the same team as Kobe Bryant, who famously threw Shaquille O’Neal under the bus during his own criminal scandal? Russell’s transgression is still fresh, all will be forgotten after awhile. Bryant is currently on his farewell tour and it is once again all love, even in rival cities.
Interestingly enough, there is something about former and current Lakers’ players and violating the “guy code.” Think about it… Derek Fisher, Bryant, and now Russell.
The “guy code” is depended upon by every guy who has done some dirt in his life and wants to carry it to his grave, every guy who has experienced a shame-worthy moment, like getting “burned” by an after the club hookup, and every guy who has ever had a friend ever in life. Women hate it, men revere it. The “guy code” is the same as the “sister code,” so there really is no reason to hate it.
“Guy code” sets up the rules for maintaining a friendship that consists of trust, loyalty, respect and secrecy when necessary. That means, if a guy’s homeboy cheats on his significant other, the cheating did not happen if the friend is ever questioned. It does not mean that the friend condones the cheating. It merely means the chastising and correction happens within the friendship. However, the friend’s loyalty remains with his friend, not his friend’s significant other.
It also means that the friendship is to be held in high regard. If, like Fisher, a man finds himself attracted to the former love of a homeboy, he lets it go. You never “backdoor” a friend. The friendship trumps selfish desires.
In Bryant’s case, the “guy code” was violated by throwing his friend under the bus to save himself. That is a high level violation as well. It means that accountability is lacking. Under the “guy code” you take responsibility for your own actions, and you do not mitigate your consequences by throwing the blame on your boy.
Now, if men started employing some of the same tenants of the “guy code” in their romantic relationships, no one would have Young’s infidelity as the topic of discussion today. The “guy code” should not be hated. You should actually replicate the guy code in your courtships and marriages. Key factors like loyalty, respect, reverence, accountability, and in-house correction aid in maintaining a relationship.